Guilt

so here we are again ... in the clutches of pain ... only now its not only my pain that I feel - it is yours as well. from deep within my soul I am sad - I am hurting ... what is the point of all this pain. I wish nothing more than to just to hold you and hug you and make you feel alright ... make me feel alright ... make all the pain dissapear ... I keep thinking that maybe it would be easier if you hated me ... so hate me ... be angry with me .... let me be the stupid bitch that broke your heart ....

I just want you to be happy - and you cant with me right now ... you can't - I know in my soul that I would make you miserable because I cannot give you what you need. I wish you could see it from my side and I wish you get understand .... I know it wont take away the pain - but it will help you heal.... and you will heal .... you will be great and you will be happy ... I know it! Just let yourself heal ... let yourself feel sad and angry and let yourself feel miserable and then let it all go .... let go and move on ....

I know this doesn't make sense right now - it will though with time ... it will. Sometimes we hang onto things because we think they will make us happy but in truth they wont ... it is all an illusion. Your guide appeared last night and he is looking after you ... just allow him to help.

Do yourself a big favour please .... dont block out the people in your life that love you ... they are with you for a reason and they love you so much.